Isn’t it funny how life is. One minute things aren’t really going how you’d like and all your plans are falling through–again–and then-Bam! He puts it all at your feet. It was all for a reason.

Remember when I had to drop to part time classes, at WKU, to take a full time job? I was happy about the job–at first–a little put out about taking a step backwards away from my degree. Then over Christmas break, I had to make the decision to drop school completely. That was a real bummer. To know that I would have been graduating right now if I had not taken this job, and now here I am disliking the job and still without my degree. Not to mention, I wouldn’t have had time for classes, lately, because of work, anyway.

Stay with me, this post is not all about not getting what I want.

As all these things happend and I kept asking God “Where are we going here? Wait a minute, I thought…..” And the whole while God was saying “Be patient. Just wait. I have something for you.”

Now that I think about it, there was actually some downfall to being in school full time. Finances were weak and we were stuck in Kentucky, still, until I finished.

Without the job to strengthen our finances and the school schedule out of the way, we couldn’t be going down the path He is leading us now. And with that, I have some big news:

We are moving to Charleston, South Carolina!

With guidance from my Dad and faith in God, Billy has gotten a great job with an energy company in Charleston. He means to make this a career and I couldn’t be more proud or thankful. This man has never held me back or told me ‘no.’ He’s always pushed me and/or been right there beside me to weather the storm. And now here he is making a dream come true. This wouldn’t have happened without his courage and determination.

The move is bitter sweet, though. During our stay in Bowling Green, we accidentally got attached. Go figure. We couldn’t wait to get out of the state and then once we actually start to settle, its time to leave.  We have so many wonderful memories, experiences and friends here. So, in memory of our life in BG, I’m going to do a series of posts over the next few weeks to say goodbye to my favorite things about Bowling Green, Kentucky.

But the fun doesn’t stop there. Fuzzy Little Wishballs is definitely coming with us and you’re invited to come along for the ride. I plan to keep you abreast of all the excitement along the way, as well as introduce you to the beauty of Charleston, which awaits.

Lately, work has been piling on the stress and raising the yuck-factor. We’re very short handed and I’m struggling to cover the hours myself as well as cover my regular duties. The hardest part isn’t the amount time working, rather the amount of time not working. The salon is stealing more and more hours away from my family. Stealing time from my little girl, whom won’t be little forever.

When I don’t have to be concentrating on work, I’m trying to keep only lovely things in mind. Digging in the dirt and climbing trees with Lil. Getting lost in a doodle. Escaping to a faraway land in a novel. Drinking margaritas with my main squeeze. Also, I’m just trying to enjoy being home, in this haven of ours.

Another source of relief is resting in the fact that I don’t have to do it alone. I know its hard right now for a reason. This wall has not been set here to stop or discourage me, rather make me stronger. I know I will benefit from this hard time somehow. This past Sunday’s message has proven to be right on time, I suppose, now that I think about it. I am an overcomer.

Also, I’m keeping this verse in mind:

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

 -Romans 8:18

I have never been one to bash public schools. As a matter of fact, I grew up with a public school teacher and have quite the appreciation for them. Its a job I might not survive. However, I have a growing discontentment with sending my own child to public schools. Now, if we lived in the very school district my stepmother teaches in, I would happily send her to that school in a heartbeat. I’ve heard nothing but wonderful things and love the training the teachers get there. It truly sounds like a wonderful place to work and attend.

I want my child to be open-minded and able to survive in the real world. However, I’m not crazy about my 5yo being around other 5yo’s kissing and no one’s doing anything about it. Or when little boys pull up her dress and the teachers just brush it off with little to know discipline. Or the random substitute that has a class for one day and has no problem telling them she’s “tired of their crap.” Also, my child is no angel and I know how limited teachers can be on disciplining. Sometimes you have to play hardball, though. Instant consequences and added responsibilities that aren’t always possible in the moment at shcool. Not to mention this whole bullying epidemic. I’m not even sure how much I really buy into that. Is it the teachers? Is it the parenting {both bully/victim}? {let the comments ensue on that one.}

Mostly, though, I don’t like complaining. And I don’t want to be the parent constantly calling or going up to the school with a problem. I’ve always said, “if you’re not going to try to do something about it, don’t complain about it either.”

I’ll be honest, I’ve never been a fan of the idea of homeschooling. I heard stories about social problems and fear of the real world. Kids that just ended up awkward and sheltered, sometimes behind and/or over-judgmental.

More and more, though, I feel a growing interest in homeschooling. I’ve seen, read and heard a lot of great feedback from it lately. There is a wonderful woman in my life, right now, that I greatly admire, whom home-schools six children. They are all wonderfully well-behaved, respectful and sociable. They are all involved in activities AND she and her family completely run the kids’ program at our church, planning and running Sunday morning, evening, wednesday night club and occasional events. Did I mention they do a fabulous job of it?? Putting aside the fact that she might secretly be supermom, I think it comes a lot from homeschooling.

I read a great article about a doctor who decided to tackle homeschooling with her IT husband by her side. She talks about the flexibility, personalized education, and {my favorite part} the way it has changed their parenting. I admire this family’s way of living. They share all responsibilities and sound like they all appreciate each other more and run smoother because of it.

I’m not saying I’m about to quit my job tomorrow and jump into it. My family is definitely not financially able to do that, yet. But it is definitely something to think about. Besides, I am trying to get into a field where its perfectly acceptable to telecommute or completely freelance from home.

What are your thoughts on homeschooling? Do you or anyone you know do it? I’ve love to hear from you.

I have a confession to make. All my life I have been scared of rejection. So much so that I used to beg my siblings to ask for permission anytime we needed it. I know, I know: the worst that could happen was them say ‘no.’ Yeah, but in my head it felt/feels like more than that. I can’t even describe it accurately. Its not just rejection I fear now, though, but also change.

Lately, I’m coming to the realization that getting a job in the creative field will be no easy task for me.  Just achieving my degree seems so far out, still. Much less getting an actual job. And what could a career move, right now, mean for my family? For our lives? What other changes might it require? Its terrifying and scary, to think about.

Over the past month or so, a recurring theme seems to exist in my observations: have courage and go for it. Whether it be about taking risks, chasing after your dreams or having faith that God will see me through it. Its constant. Even my stepmom said these words to me in an email just this morning: Take a deep breath and jump. The strange part was the effect those words seemed to have on me. I instantly felt emotional and I can’t even tell you why.

The job I have now is a good one that gives me management experience and a good paycheck. Its not fulfilling for me, though. Its just a stepping stone. I’ve been praying and begging for signs as to what I should do with my career for months. Lately, I started seeing lots of design opportunities on Craigslist. And then a former peer contacted me with some design work to have done. My designs skills being needed felt great after several months with no classes/projects.

Today, though, my train of thought was ambushed. My dream company posted a link with a job opening. I was excited at first, and then the thoughts of rejection and change took over. Me? They wouldn’t hire me. They are so awesome its intimidating. And change? Holy cow, that would be a big change for us.

I’ve been praying for signs, asking God to scream the answers at me so I don’t miss them. But maybe they’re already there. Maybe I’ve already been seeing them, just not with the right perspective. Maybe all those messages weren’t just coincidence. Maybe those were the signs.

Maybe that’s why my stepmom’s words were so moving. It wasn’t the words, rather the realization. Maybe He’s telling me to go for it. Don’t be scared, He’ll take care of us. My dream career isn’t something I’m going to bump into. Its something I’m going to have to chase after. That might require me running and getting a little out of breath. I might trip and fall. It might even turn around and stick its tongue out at me when I’m lagging just out of reach.

Maybe it will require me to take a deep breath and jump.

With online shopping, boutiques, and malls the choice of companies to buy from are endless. The quality of the product and service can be a bit hit and miss, though. Not just from company to company, but sometimes even within a company. Every now and then, though, you find a good one. One worth being faithful to. A company that not only appreciates their customers but doesn’t mind taking the time to spoil and invest in them…..before they’ve even bought anything.

That’s basically how my first experience with Gaiam has been. As I told you the other day, I’m finally making an exercise routine I can stick with. Yoga is something I’ve dabbled in and read about off and on since before Lil was born. Recently, though, I’ve jumped all the way in. I’m doing it.

Sunday evening was my first session. As suggested by a lovely friend from high school soccer, I checked out Gaiam on Hulu. Then I browsed their website to see what all they had to offer. By my second session on the living room carpet, I realized why they used the yoga mats. With and without my socks, my feet and toes had no grip on the floor to hold my poses. I decided I needed a mat.

Just in the knick of time, a fabulous family friend came to the rescue. One who just so happens to work at Gaiam. What luck, right? She offered to send me one of her spare mats, which was super nice of her. What started out as a generous offer, though turned me into a loyal customer. My friend talked to a coworker and before I knew it, a care package was on its way to Kentucky.

That’s right, some sweet lady made me {and Lilie Jo} her project for the day.  She gathered up all kinds of goodies and overnighted a package to us. I could not be more grateful or surprised by their generosity. Gaiam wins. I’ll be sure not to purchase any more of my yoga necessities anywhere else. They’ve won over my pocketbook and my heart. Not to mention, the products truly are wonderful.

Lilie Jo and I each received our own standard thickness yoga mat along with one thick one which will be good for harder surfaces. Yes, count that again: THREE yoga mats. Ms. Generosity also sent us two organic cotton Gaiam tote bags that fold up, two yoga mat bags and two water bottles {which I was already a fan of}. She also threw in a couple of foam activities for Lil. Too much.

We hurried upstairs and changed to try the new mats out with one of Gaiam’s family yoga sessions on Hulu. I cannot thank Gaiam enough for their generosity. I’m on a search for a name and address to personally send her a thank you.

I also want to pass along some good old fashioned word-of-mouth advertising.

Please go check out the Gaiam website. Its full of great information and products. If you’re into fitness, green living, personal growth, health and/or wellness check them out. Some of my favorites to add to the cart are this gorgeous fair trade necklace made from wood, these really cool yoga socks because I always have cold feet, this comfy looking every-day tank, or this ballet wrap skirt, which I’m totally digging for work or everyday where.

Have you ever had your own wonderful experience with a brand? Tell me about the company and why you made the decision to stick with them?

Wednesday nights, lately, this family has had a full schedule. Lilie Jo attends Awana, Bill hangs out at men’s small group and I’ve been leading the ladies’ small group. Tonight, though, I’m sitting on the couch with an under-the-weather little girl.

Tonight, my group of ladies is talking about one of my favorite devotionals. Their verse of inspiration is:

I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.

-Jesus in Matthew 18:3 NIV

The topic of discussion, specifically, covers prayer. Our way of communicating with God. As with all relationships, especially intimate ones, it needs to be honest and often. It doesn’t require fancy words or sugar coating. Just as a mother loves to hear the chatter of her little ones, our Father loves to here us. And God is big enough to handle it all. Our happy, thankful conversations, as well as our angry, doubtful ones. He just wants to hear us. Honestly.

I hated missing out on sharing this one with the group. But gladly sit here cuddled on the couch with a special someone. Its a verse and lesson I still hold in the front of my mind, though I first read it several, several months ago. However, I figured, instead, I could share/discuss it here. Its been a while since I’ve updated, anyway.

My beautiful little family is still working on putting more good habits in place. We’re still consistently working with a budget. Lilie Jo is learning/memorizing a new Bible verse every week. She asks almost every day if its a church day. He eagerness to grow and learn with the church makes me so happy. Bill has been very consistently working out the past few weeks. This week he picked up a workout partner from church.

I started practicing yoga, at home, this week. I’d like to make this happen at least 5-6 days a week. I understand things may interfere, but my goal is to make it habit. I had originally planned to get a gym membership and attend classes, and then I was suggested to check out Gaiam on Hulu. They even have training for family/children’s yoga. I love all I’ve done with them so far. They have an excellent and informative website with lots of great products, too.

After another week or two, I hope to leave the privacy of my own living room and venture out to attend a hot yoga class. Maybe by then I’ll be a little less sore and a little more flexible. I may have even found a yogi friend or two, already, through all my excited ramblings. Hoping they can teach me a thing or two.

 Is there anything new you’ve been working to integrate into your life? A new habit? A new hobby? Tell me about it.

Hey, darlin! Can you believe its even February already? Another ‘holiday’ is upon us. Yep, I’m talking about Valentine’s day. Warning, if you’re single and bitter, stop here.  However, if you’re married, engaged, committed or may ever even consider being so again, read, on, girl, read on.

Let me start off by asking you a simple question: What does the word grace mean to you? Beauty? Elegance? Class? Good form? Mercy? That’s kind of what I thought, anyway.  It was a pretty word which also worked as a lovely girl’s name. I heard and read about grace a lot in church, but it never really meant anything special for me personally.

During my quiet time one day, a year and a half ago, I was reading an excerpt from my favorite devotional, by Shelia Walsh, Good Morning, Lord. Walsh described the scene from Calvary when the criminal was saved as a ‘vivid picture of grace.’ She defined the word as ‘unmerited favor.’ She even went on to call grace unfair, for it is given despite the many or few good works one has done.

Unmerited favor. I remember looking further into this’grace’ word, that day and stumbled about another definition of the word. I can’t remember where I read it, but someone described grace as stooping to give mercy/love to someone below us.   Then and there, the word grace and all its heaviness suddenly sunk in.

Unmerited favor. Stooping.  I visualized my big, huge, powerful God, in all His perfectness, stooping to love on messy, dirty, sin-filled me.

How does that connect to Valentine’s Day? Its about making a successful marriage/relationship using grace.

Have you read the quote “A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers?”  Its a good one, but I think its still missing something. I think it requires graceful forgivers.

I, personally have forgiven many people for many things, and vice versa. However, I may not have went on to nurture the relationship I had with them. Yes, forgiveness was given, but maybe not forgotten. Distance grew, maybe to protect myself and/or my child. Was that the godly thing to do? That’s neither here nor there. The point is, you can’t do that in a successful marriage and I’m sure you already know this.

Over the past year, in my new marriage, I have had some real hands on experience learning exactly what it means to give grace.  I won’t sugar coat it, its been a typical first year, I think. The honeymoon ended and we realized we really were stuck with each other. Even though we had been living together already, it was no longer just about the now, but also the future and how we were going to get there.

We both pretty well wanted the same things and to get to the same places. However, our plans for getting there weren’t quite parallel.  There was a lot of pushing and pulling in both directions. There were a few bad habits that needed to be changed and some good habits that needed to be started.

I’ll go ahead and admit that I’m by no means a perfect wife, but I want to share my experience with learning to give grace, in this post.

Mistakes were made and forgiven…. but not properly. Baggage, pride and a lack of grace were holding us back.

When my husband really messed up, I was bitter and found myself preparing for it to happen again. A defense mechanism, perhaps. I’d forgive him, but couldn’t forget it. It got to where I expected the mistakes. Slowly, our mistakes piled up between us.  His apologies become meaningless word vomit, to me. My critical words became daggers of truth to him.  His confidence went down along with my respect.

Then I read this amazing article and had a moment of conviction. I needed to stop focusing on him and focus on Him. I can’t fix my husband and my husband can’t fix me. So I started putting it in God’s hands, focusing on how I could be a godly wife and practicing giving grace. Yes, he’d messed up, often. But that’s what grace was all about: forgiving him and letting it go even if I didn’t think he deserved it….again.

And we’d said forever. It wasn’t about a feeling, rather the promise we’d made; not just to each other but to God.

Instead of always expecting mess ups, I’ve just been working on not expecting so much. I’m trying to zero my focus to making sure we succeeded this life together. Yes, that was always my intent: for him/us to succeed at life.  But now, my focus had changed a little. I wanted us to succeed at us. I started thinking of more ways I could help us. Even if it meant cheating.

You helped your marriage by cheating?! Not that kind. I mean like giving him the answers to the test. When I get to come home a little early, instead of worrying if he’d done what he’d told me, yet, I make a point to call or text him as a heads up. Then, if he hasn’t, he can scramble to get it done before I walked in the door to be disappointmented and/or frustrated. Should he need the heads up? Should he have just followed through with his word? Probably not and probably so. I don’t know, but I think that’s what grace is. You know, like a grace period for your bills, maybe?

Not earned/deserved. Its a gift.

What if he does it every day for a month? Does he still deserve that forgiveness? Grace says yes, he does. And should you hold back that just-because back rub because of his forgetfulness? Grace says give it anyway.

I have found that in my practicing grace, my anger and frustration is more quickly forgotten. This grace thing is so good for both of us.

Enough rambling. My point is, I want to change the quote, rather add something to it. A good marriage isn’t just about forgiving each other. You have to forgive gracefully. Over and over again, life every time is the first.  A successful marriage is the partnership of two graceful forgivers. They don’t forgive just because they’re supposed to, because the apology was good enough, because they owe it or because the person deserves it. They forgive because they love each other. The forgiveness is a gift. An unearned gift. One stooping to the other to lift them back up. Side by side, even.

For Valentine’s Day, I’ve created this grace and love inspired print for your taking. Its yours to do as you please. Pin it, print it, frame it, hang it. Maybe you could even send me a picture of where and how you put it on display?

Happy Valentine’s Day, love.

click here for 8.5” x 11” jpg file

Something wonderful and beautiful has started around here. We have started budgeting. I put my foot down and insisted we do it as part of our 2013 changes.  I’ve attempted several times before. Made a plan, created a spread sheet… you know the deal. But there was never any follow through.

I couldn’t do it on my own, though. Just like the rest of our marriage, it requires both of our efforts. Billy was never really taught much about managing money when he was growing up, which makes it all the more intimidating and frustrating for him. Together, though, we managed to make it through our first full month of budgeting, beginning to end.

There are all kinds of free spreadsheets and templates out there, but none made me happy. Being the control freak that I am, I thought it would be better to just make one myself. That way I would understand the whole thing and be able to make the changes here and there as I see fit.

We created our own spread sheet which displays out monthly projected and actual income, spending, savings, and bills.  We have several columns to divide up our different types of spending {bills, gas, grocery, eating out, church, misc…} and sections to record any notes or observations, as well as debt progress. I have a tab for every month this year so we can keep it all together. Then we share it in a private drop box folder so we both have access to updating the file at all times.

This really seems to be working out well for us so far.

The best part has really been our teamwork.  Not just with recording and paying the bills on time, but in holding each other accountable on the spending.  Now that we are both more aware of exactly what we have spent and where we stand financially {communication} we are getting better at saying ‘no.’  No to ourselves and no to each other.

Heck, we even have Lilie Jo in on the ‘no’ action.  When begging to go out to eat I told her exactly why we didn’t want to spend the money for a good time now, rather save it to buy our own home later.  I enticed her with the excitement of painting her bedroom what ever color she wanted, getting a new kittie {or two} and building tree houses in the backyard.  Next thing I knew she was questioning every thing I looked at or talked about in a store, “Do you need that, Mommy, or just want it?”  God has started using my five year old to build my self control, apparently. Great.

We weren’t perfect, our first month, for sure. We still have some spending we need to cut out. Recording everything, though, has brought that more to light.  We see our mistakes more clearly and plan to work on them.  February, so far, is getting off to a great start, as well.  For the first time in a while, we have several bills paid even though they aren’t even due yet. That feels awesome.  Having a stable, more predictable income sure does help. I can’t wait until Billy starts his new job.

Well, kind of.  I won’t lie, he’s gotten pretty darn good at holding down the fort.  I wish I could just get a hefty raise and then pay him to stay at home. I’ve hardly even been allowed to cook, lately. Don’t tell him I told you this, but he might even be better at it than me.  Over achiever….yeesh.

What goals have you been working on for 2013? What was your progress for January?

Here I am posting more than once within a month. Can you remember the last time that happened? That was meant to be a rhetorical question, smarty-pants. A change in my posting frequency can always be a sign of a change(s) in my life. Yep, you got it: I’ve been going through some more changes.

My full time management position has once again effected my school schedule and professional plan. I just can’t make the schedules work together. Not with Lilie Jo waiting at home.

I’ve dropped out completely, now, with the intentions of finishing online. Will it happen this semester? Don’t think so. This year? I hope so. Am I happy about? Ehh. You know me.

I won’t lie, though, I was feeling pretty defeated and discouraged when I first came to the conclusion. I may even be guilty of sulking a bit. But then I kicked myself in the tush and made a change of focus and perspective. Not to mention some encouragement from some really amazing people. Turns out, the pros out-weigh the cons:

• More stable day-to-day home life and routine
• More family time
• More energy
• Less running around
• Less chaotic schedules
• Less stress {all different kinds}
• More time for me {reading, blogging, photography, short trips, crafts}
• More time to serve at church

I’ll be able to focus more of my time and energy into doing the best I can with the career I have now. I’m in a great position and making decent money. Not to mention, this job will look great on a resume, so why not make the best of it and really give it my all? Who knows where it may take me.

And get this: my church just hit a big milestone. For the past year, we’ve been meeting in a theater, which has been very limiting and required us to set up and tear down every week. This past Sunday, though, we tore down for the last time and moved to a permanent location.

How coincidental is that? We’ll now have more freedom to do and more opportunities for growth. Now I’m certain Someone is trying to keep us here {instead of moving away like we originally planned}. These changes give me the opportunity to serve and give more of my time and talents to RLC.

More time for my family {home and church} makes this decision conclusion worth it.

{warning: poor image quality to come}

Another year gone. Though I can’t think of a big long list of events that occurred, a lot has passed, none the less. We are not just older individually, but another year older as a family. Though far from perfect, we’ve had another year to learn to live and work together. Part of me would say we aren’t any closer to achieving our goals, but then I take a deeper look.

time spent playing games as a fmaily is happening more and more

Sure we’re in the same town house, but its more homey and memory-filled than last year.

a few days in the sand hills of nebraska

No, we didn’t go on any vacations to far off tropical places, but we did venture west for a week with loved ones.

another sunday amongst friends at rlc

Yes, we’re still in Kentucky.  But we’ve some how managed to grow some roots, here, with new friends and a church to call home. It might be harder to leave when the time comes. But we’re leaving that timing in His hands, now.

the daily grind at jcp salon

And–big sigh–no, I still haven’t received my degree, but I have landed myself a real, grownup full time job. Though I sometimes despise it, its blessed my family in so many ways. Who knows what other doors it may open for me in the future.

christmas 2012

Sure, our savings account still isn’t where we want it to be, but we were able to have the best Christmas yet, this year. It brought so much joy being able to bless our loved ones with gifts.

I think our biggest accomplishment for 2012 has been our family’s spiritual growth. As a whole, our relationship with God is stronger. Our obedience is more consistant. We have felt His love so strongly this year. He’s saved and blessed us so much. Through Him, our bonds with each other are stronger. We love each other more and forgive each other faster.

No, 2012 may not have been eventful, but it was a blessed one, indeed. More than going and doing, we were growing and learning. I can’t wait to see what He has in store for us in 2013.