Lately, work has been piling on the stress and raising the yuck-factor. We’re very short handed and I’m struggling to cover the hours myself as well as cover my regular duties. The hardest part isn’t the amount time working, rather the amount of time not working. The salon is stealing more and more hours away from my family. Stealing time from my little girl, whom won’t be little forever.

When I don’t have to be concentrating on work, I’m trying to keep only lovely things in mind. Digging in the dirt and climbing trees with Lil. Getting lost in a doodle. Escaping to a faraway land in a novel. Drinking margaritas with my main squeeze. Also, I’m just trying to enjoy being home, in this haven of ours.

Another source of relief is resting in the fact that I don’t have to do it alone. I know its hard right now for a reason. This wall has not been set here to stop or discourage me, rather make me stronger. I know I will benefit from this hard time somehow. This past Sunday’s message has proven to be right on time, I suppose, now that I think about it. I am an overcomer.

Also, I’m keeping this verse in mind:

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

 -Romans 8:18

I have never been one to bash public schools. As a matter of fact, I grew up with a public school teacher and have quite the appreciation for them. Its a job I might not survive. However, I have a growing discontentment with sending my own child to public schools. Now, if we lived in the very school district my stepmother teaches in, I would happily send her to that school in a heartbeat. I’ve heard nothing but wonderful things and love the training the teachers get there. It truly sounds like a wonderful place to work and attend.

I want my child to be open-minded and able to survive in the real world. However, I’m not crazy about my 5yo being around other 5yo’s kissing and no one’s doing anything about it. Or when little boys pull up her dress and the teachers just brush it off with little to know discipline. Or the random substitute that has a class for one day and has no problem telling them she’s “tired of their crap.” Also, my child is no angel and I know how limited teachers can be on disciplining. Sometimes you have to play hardball, though. Instant consequences and added responsibilities that aren’t always possible in the moment at shcool. Not to mention this whole bullying epidemic. I’m not even sure how much I really buy into that. Is it the teachers? Is it the parenting {both bully/victim}? {let the comments ensue on that one.}

Mostly, though, I don’t like complaining. And I don’t want to be the parent constantly calling or going up to the school with a problem. I’ve always said, “if you’re not going to try to do something about it, don’t complain about it either.”

I’ll be honest, I’ve never been a fan of the idea of homeschooling. I heard stories about social problems and fear of the real world. Kids that just ended up awkward and sheltered, sometimes behind and/or over-judgmental.

More and more, though, I feel a growing interest in homeschooling. I’ve seen, read and heard a lot of great feedback from it lately. There is a wonderful woman in my life, right now, that I greatly admire, whom home-schools six children. They are all wonderfully well-behaved, respectful and sociable. They are all involved in activities AND she and her family completely run the kids’ program at our church, planning and running Sunday morning, evening, wednesday night club and occasional events. Did I mention they do a fabulous job of it?? Putting aside the fact that she might secretly be supermom, I think it comes a lot from homeschooling.

I read a great article about a doctor who decided to tackle homeschooling with her IT husband by her side. She talks about the flexibility, personalized education, and {my favorite part} the way it has changed their parenting. I admire this family’s way of living. They share all responsibilities and sound like they all appreciate each other more and run smoother because of it.

I’m not saying I’m about to quit my job tomorrow and jump into it. My family is definitely not financially able to do that, yet. But it is definitely something to think about. Besides, I am trying to get into a field where its perfectly acceptable to telecommute or completely freelance from home.

What are your thoughts on homeschooling? Do you or anyone you know do it? I’ve love to hear from you.

With online shopping, boutiques, and malls the choice of companies to buy from are endless. The quality of the product and service can be a bit hit and miss, though. Not just from company to company, but sometimes even within a company. Every now and then, though, you find a good one. One worth being faithful to. A company that not only appreciates their customers but doesn’t mind taking the time to spoil and invest in them…..before they’ve even bought anything.

That’s basically how my first experience with Gaiam has been. As I told you the other day, I’m finally making an exercise routine I can stick with. Yoga is something I’ve dabbled in and read about off and on since before Lil was born. Recently, though, I’ve jumped all the way in. I’m doing it.

Sunday evening was my first session. As suggested by a lovely friend from high school soccer, I checked out Gaiam on Hulu. Then I browsed their website to see what all they had to offer. By my second session on the living room carpet, I realized why they used the yoga mats. With and without my socks, my feet and toes had no grip on the floor to hold my poses. I decided I needed a mat.

Just in the knick of time, a fabulous family friend came to the rescue. One who just so happens to work at Gaiam. What luck, right? She offered to send me one of her spare mats, which was super nice of her. What started out as a generous offer, though turned me into a loyal customer. My friend talked to a coworker and before I knew it, a care package was on its way to Kentucky.

That’s right, some sweet lady made me {and Lilie Jo} her project for the day.  She gathered up all kinds of goodies and overnighted a package to us. I could not be more grateful or surprised by their generosity. Gaiam wins. I’ll be sure not to purchase any more of my yoga necessities anywhere else. They’ve won over my pocketbook and my heart. Not to mention, the products truly are wonderful.

Lilie Jo and I each received our own standard thickness yoga mat along with one thick one which will be good for harder surfaces. Yes, count that again: THREE yoga mats. Ms. Generosity also sent us two organic cotton Gaiam tote bags that fold up, two yoga mat bags and two water bottles {which I was already a fan of}. She also threw in a couple of foam activities for Lil. Too much.

We hurried upstairs and changed to try the new mats out with one of Gaiam’s family yoga sessions on Hulu. I cannot thank Gaiam enough for their generosity. I’m on a search for a name and address to personally send her a thank you.

I also want to pass along some good old fashioned word-of-mouth advertising.

Please go check out the Gaiam website. Its full of great information and products. If you’re into fitness, green living, personal growth, health and/or wellness check them out. Some of my favorites to add to the cart are this gorgeous fair trade necklace made from wood, these really cool yoga socks because I always have cold feet, this comfy looking every-day tank, or this ballet wrap skirt, which I’m totally digging for work or everyday where.

Have you ever had your own wonderful experience with a brand? Tell me about the company and why you made the decision to stick with them?

Wednesday nights, lately, this family has had a full schedule. Lilie Jo attends Awana, Bill hangs out at men’s small group and I’ve been leading the ladies’ small group. Tonight, though, I’m sitting on the couch with an under-the-weather little girl.

Tonight, my group of ladies is talking about one of my favorite devotionals. Their verse of inspiration is:

I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.

-Jesus in Matthew 18:3 NIV

The topic of discussion, specifically, covers prayer. Our way of communicating with God. As with all relationships, especially intimate ones, it needs to be honest and often. It doesn’t require fancy words or sugar coating. Just as a mother loves to hear the chatter of her little ones, our Father loves to here us. And God is big enough to handle it all. Our happy, thankful conversations, as well as our angry, doubtful ones. He just wants to hear us. Honestly.

I hated missing out on sharing this one with the group. But gladly sit here cuddled on the couch with a special someone. Its a verse and lesson I still hold in the front of my mind, though I first read it several, several months ago. However, I figured, instead, I could share/discuss it here. Its been a while since I’ve updated, anyway.

My beautiful little family is still working on putting more good habits in place. We’re still consistently working with a budget. Lilie Jo is learning/memorizing a new Bible verse every week. She asks almost every day if its a church day. He eagerness to grow and learn with the church makes me so happy. Bill has been very consistently working out the past few weeks. This week he picked up a workout partner from church.

I started practicing yoga, at home, this week. I’d like to make this happen at least 5-6 days a week. I understand things may interfere, but my goal is to make it habit. I had originally planned to get a gym membership and attend classes, and then I was suggested to check out Gaiam on Hulu. They even have training for family/children’s yoga. I love all I’ve done with them so far. They have an excellent and informative website with lots of great products, too.

After another week or two, I hope to leave the privacy of my own living room and venture out to attend a hot yoga class. Maybe by then I’ll be a little less sore and a little more flexible. I may have even found a yogi friend or two, already, through all my excited ramblings. Hoping they can teach me a thing or two.

 Is there anything new you’ve been working to integrate into your life? A new habit? A new hobby? Tell me about it.

my favorite part about this picture is that every single thing was the commentary which went along with it. each piece of the drawing has a purpose/meaning. lilie jo is always so intentional with her drawings. she explains every little thing as she goes. i need to record her explaining sometime. i think that might be something i want to hang onto.

Christmas is just around the corner! Have you started your Christmas shopping yet? We have ours mostly finished, actually. Lilie Jo’s is about all we have left. At the beginning of the month, we thought we had hers all figured out. It wasn’t going to be much in quantity, but pricey and high quality, none the less.

And then I kind of came to my senses and remembered the parent aim to be.

Lilie Jo was all set to receive her own tablet this Christmas. We researched and compared the Leapster LeapPad 1 and 2 and the Nabi 2. One more expensive up front, but the other more so in the long run. So many things to consider about each. Then, one night, while I was laying in bed–that’s where all my greatest thinking happens–it came to me.

She’s five years old. Her imagination and curiosity are on fire. She still has such willingness to do and learn.

Sure, tablets are full of educational games. And we all know this generation is one which is being raised on technology. Of course, we should teach them to use it now so they aren’t behind later. And I know it would be fabulous for car rides.

But you know what? She has school, parents, books, morning cartoons and every day life to educate her. She uses technology at school and home, enough, to not fall behind in that arena. And she has a portable DVD player and will soon be reading her own books in the car for entertainment.

I don’t want a stationary five year old. {I’ll probably regret saying that at some point.}

I don’t want to teach this creative, independent, imaginative little girl to depend on a machine to entertain her. I want her to run and play dress up, not sit in one spot only moving her hands and fingers. I want her to make believe with her dolls and toys. Get real paint on her hands when she creates a work of art. I want her to practice holding and writing with a real pen or pencil.

Most of all, I don’t want to be that parent, in five years, arming their child with a cell phone at the age of ten. I also don’t want her hooked on video games. I, personally, have seen one too many disasters with that obsession. Rather than trying to set and stick to limitations, let’s just avoid the situation completely a little longer.

So, the Christmas list has changed a bit. Its longer, but not much different in price. Its a list of quality and quantity, if you ask me. One that consists of legos for building imaginary villages, furniture and dolls to pretend with, art supplies to create with and–as with every occasion–books to enrich her mind and feed her beautiful imagination.

Tell me: what are you shopping for this year?

note: i’m not bashing technology or parents who choose to immerse their children in it a lot/a little at any age. its just my personal opinion and parenting style. its about what i think is appropriate for my child, at her current age, and with my personal parenting strategies. i’d love to hear your thoughts on the subject.

A lot, yet very little, seems to be going on lately. We’re constantly running around with different schedules to keep up with.

Lilie Jo is on Fall Break this week and is spending part of it with Grandma and Aunt Ariel. Here, on the homefront, we’re planning and preparing for out little camping trip coming up this weekend. We’re taking Lil Jo to Mammoth Cave for the first time. Its the perfect time of year for camping and I’m stoked.  We’ll only being staying one night and day since we need to be up so early Sunday mornings, but I’m sure we’ll have lots of fun.

Work lately–deep breath–is not even going to be touched in this post. I’d rather keep only the good energy here.  Catch my drift?

Moving on.

One day last week, Lilie and I set off for a trip to the park. The air was a tad crisp, the wind was perfect and our moods were high.  Lilie Jo, her crazy curls and that blissful smile of hers had me reaching for my camera. I wanted to capture the pure essence of Fall in that little one. We didn’t try sprucing the hair of putting on the “perfect” outfit. We just grabbed the camera and climbed some trees.

I finally got my Five-years-old/Fall pictures.  Mama is pleased.

Lilie Jo is so full of life and every now and then I just need to borrow some of it to blow back into my sails. The energy is bad, at work, and its really hard sometimes most times to remember the reason I took the position. I like the job, its self, its just the mass amount of negative attitudes. There are so many of them and its so easy to get caught up in the mess.

But then I get to come home to this magical little creature–and pumpkin muffins. Some snuggles and silliness usually melts away the bad vibes–for a little while.

Today marks the day of me becoming a new person five years ago.  The day my sweet little creature was born.  I can hardly believe I’ve only know her for five years and yet it doesn’t seem that long at all. This past weekend was full of fun time and friends, for us.  Lilie Jo had a campout sleep over Friday night.  I created this invitation design for Lil to pass out to her friends.  I wanted something cute, not overly girly, but consistant with the party “theme.”

My little social butterfly had some lady friends over for cupcakes, hide and seek, smores and an outdoor viewing of The Lorax.  Billy borrowed some equipment to set up an outdoor theater.  We hung a sheet on the side of the house and the girls loved it.

We had no problems with missing Mamas or wanting to go home, at all.  I made white chocolate chip muffins for breakfast before finishing up more cupcakes for party number two.

Yes, number two.  Apparently people like this girl? We headed north, to our home town, where we had a small get together at the park with family.

Yes, she really let Mama have it with all this kindergarten and turning five stuff.  Within a week, I had to send her off to the first day of school and watch her turn five.  Apparently the universe is trying to make sure I know how fast she’s growing up.  I get it, already!! Sheesh!

Can any of you other mamas share a similar story from your experience in motherhood?

This is a day that I didn’t expect.  I’ve always been the mom who promotes my child’s independence as much as safely possible.  Though she’s my one and only baby whom I consider my greatest accomplishment, I don’t want to smother her with it.  I want to give her just enough room to be who she wants to be confidently and responsibly.

When asked about how I felt prior to her first day of kindergarten, I was certain I wouldn’t be a weepy mom.  After all, I’m excited for her and her new adventure.  I’m also excited for us and the new adventures we’ll be able to share together as she gets older and able to do more.

I’ve always been a very emotional person {ask my old girlfriends}.  However, I’ve gotten better at hiding it over the years.  Then I woke up the morning of Lilie Jo’s first day of school.  The emotions hit me like a pound of bricks.  Before I even pulled the covers back, I found myself in the middle of a full on crying session.  Here I was proud, puzzled and crying uncontrollably.  You have no idea how badly this confused me.  It threw my whole morning off.

Lilie Jo, on the other hand, handled it like a champ.  I hid my emotions from her and encouraged and fueled her excitement, instead.  She came home happy as a lark, going on and on about how it was “the best day ever.”

I am so proud of what a good person she already is.  Lilie Jo is so compassionate and full of empathy.  She is creative, thoughtful and very clever.  Her powers are usually used for good, thank goodness.  Friends come easily for Lil and her perspective is beautiful.  She is such an amazing little lady.

My greatest accomplishment, indeed.

Please don’t judge me when I tell you that it took me 27 years to get a full time job.  Its just part of the industry.  Very rarely is someone able to jump in full time with instant success {especially if they are raising children}.

I’ve worked two jobs as well as worked part time while attending school full time.  But a full time, 40 hours a week, salary job?  This is the first.  I think I did pretty good for my first week, too.  I actually put in about 44-45 hours, to be precise.  I didn’t even complain.

Turning that salon around will be a challenge, for sure.  But one I am excited to take on and makeover.

However, I’ve decided not to go on with the original plan of full time job and full time school.  I just don’t think I can handle it with scheduled meetings and other work requirements.  Not to mention the fact that I don’t want to spend the three hours I have with Lilie Jo, every night, before bedtime filled completely with homework and other house chores.

I’ve definitely learned, this past week, that I need a decent bedtime…. and lots of coffee {but that’s not new}.

Call me lazy and uncommitted all you want.  I don’t care.  My time spent with Baby Bear is way more precious to me than than having that bachelor’s degree in May.  It will still be there next December and/or May 2014.  Lilie Jo-the-kindergartener will not.

I’ve spent years searching, fighting and praying for a job, within my talents, with substantial pay to help provide for my family.  That’s why I was in such a rush to get back in and finished with school.  But then this sweet little opportunity was basically gifted wrapped and set in my lap.  No, its not the exact job I originally had in mind.  But then again, who am I to know what’s best for me and mine?  That’s all up to ole big guns, up stairs.  And I’d be lying if I told you I wasn’t happy or excited about my new salon leader position.

So, with all this change {mine and Lil’s birthday, salon job, starting kindergarden}, I thought my hair needed a little change, too.  I decided to try a subtle ombre.  The ombre trend is all over the place: clothes, nails, hair.  I had to get in on a little of that.

If you’re one of my Instagram followers, I’m sure you’ve been dying to see the final result.  What do you think?  Should I keep it or lighten the ends a bit more?

Friends, I’m so excited to host a very inspiring guest post from a strong woman and mother.  Please give a warm southern welcome to Heather.

I wasn’t prepared for the storm. When my daughter was born on August 4, 2005, my life appeared to be perfect. How could I think otherwise? I had my parents, in-laws, and friends all around me to help greet my little one’s entrance into the world.

Storms are like that sometimes. They begin with just a few dark clouds, but instead of breaking up, they continue to grow. That’s how my life was. I went back to work, but I didn’t feel well. I was exhausted and having trouble breathing, so I went to see my doctor. After a series of tests, I was diagnosed with mesothelioma cancer on November 21, 2005. It was only 3-1/2 months since Lily came into our lives. The type of cancer I had was pleural mesothelioma. It is caused by asbestos exposure and affects the lining of the lungs. Apparently, I had been exposed about 30 years earlier as a child.

The doctor gave me about 15 months to live, but I couldn’t do that to my husband and child. I had to help myself for them. In early February we left Lily with my parents in South Dakota and flew to Boston where I underwent surgery to remove my left lung. I spent 18 days in the hospital and another two months in recovery before I began chemotherapy and radiation treatments.

One of the realities about being so ill is that it shows you who your friends are. Many people I thought would be there took off and others whom I didn’t expect to see gave us their full support. Kids I babysat as a teenager returned the favor and watched Lily while my parents worked. People I went to church with surrounded my parents and gave them the love and support they needed. In Boston, I made new friends with people who were going through the same thing I was.

One of the most difficult things for me was watching my baby grow from a distance. My mother emailed me photographs and my husband printed them off, but it was hard not to cry. I wasn’t there to deal with the bottles or to see Lily scoot. Yet, I knew I was fighting this fight for her. Cancer can be funny that way. It’s a storm that no one ever expects, but there are many good and loving things that come along with the bad. My daughter, my husband, my new friends, and my parents are a few of the things I’m most grateful for.

Heather Von St James is a 43-year-old wife and mother. Upon her diagnosis of mesothelioma, she vowed to be a source of hope for other patients who found themselves with the same diagnosis. Now, over 6 years later, her story has been helping people all over the globe. She continues her advocacy and awareness work by blogging, speaking and sharing her message of hope and healing with others. Check out her story at the Mesothelioma Cancer Alliance Blog.