Who’s raising your daughter?

Posted in Faith & Perspective,The Greatest Adventure of All by meghannchapman on March 29th, 2011


I love Dove’s Campaign for Real Beauty.  The message is beautiful and inspiring.   I first saw the above commercial in one of my classes at WKU.  This one really got me.  In that adorable little ginger, I saw both myself, as a child, as well as my sweet little Lilie.

I know I can’t keep her little and innocent forever.  I honestly don’t even wish that.  I do, however, wish her to be strong, confident and secure in who she is.  I’ve learned so much, about advertising and mass media, in my classes so far, and one thing is for sure: the media has control over our girls.

Girls are so pressured, mostly by the media, to look and act a certain way.  We are letting commercials, tv shows, movies, and celebrities control the maturing of our daughters.  They are starting to wear make up, shave and strive for the attention of the opposite sex at younger ages.

What can we do to take back control?  Lots of things.

I decided to research and read a few articles on this subject.  Here is a list of just a few things you can do in raising your daughters to be a more intelligent, successful, confident woman:

  • Avoid diet talk.
  • Avoid talking about shapes and sizes of bodies.
  • Downplay looks and emphasize actions.
  • Mom, dctions speak louder than words.  SHOW her how to be that woman.
  • Dad, stop treating her like a little princess.  Instead, point out how strong, smart and hardworking she is.
  • Offer a wide variety of toys, ignoring gender restrictions/labels.
  • Make time to talk and encourage them to talk about anything.  For instance, don’t tell her she’s too young to think about boys.  Make her feel comfortable to talk about ANYthing.
  • Eat dinner at the table with the whole family as often as possible.
  • I know we can’t completely shelter our daughters, but we do need to be more aware of what we allow them to see and watch.

Now, boys.  When a group of over 2,000 third-twelfth graders were asked if girls had the same abilities and strengths as boys, only 29% of the boys said yes.  Its time to start building our girls up through the male population, as well.  Parents need to be more aware of how they are raising their sons to view females.

Want to read more?  I found these articles.websites to be very insightful and very helpful.  I encourage you to read more.

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7 comments
  • Mary Ann Anderberg

    I certainly agree. Both boys and girls are growing up too fast and are cheated out of being innocent “kids”.

  • http://renegadegorilla.wordpress.com renegadegorilla

    Meghann,
    I admire you raising a daughter, going to school at the same time and working. Mothers do not get enough credit. I really liked your post. I work with children and have worked with a number of all girl schools and now am working with youth specifically in health and wellness programs. I loved the list you provided. You are spot on. We need to empower the girls of today to be confident and comfortable with themselves for everything they are. I have made it a part of my philosophy and life’s work. I also work with boys and have a whole set of tenets for raising boys, but girls often get slighted. Your daughter is lucky to have a mother like you. And, I am lucky to have stumbled across your blog.You seem to be an admirable woman. I wish I had more parents like you around here in New Jersey. Thank you for all you do.

    • http://meghannchapman.wordpress.com Meghann Hay

      Wow, thank you so much for the compliment and also for stopping by. That is such a compliment and I really appreciate it. I’m glad so glad you enjoyed my post. I appreciate any and all comments and/or suggestions you may have. :)

      • http://renegadegorilla.wordpress.com renegadegorilla

        You’re welcome. Its just nice to see someone who gets it. There are a lot of parents out there who miss the point of being the parent. I look forward to reading your future posts.

  • http://www.laurenbonk.com Lauren

    Just recently, I’ve read a few posts lamenting the “loss of innocence” of our young female population…and I was left feeling dismayed. They were full of pointed fingers and hopelessness at the current state of things…as though there was nothing we could do about it, or even worse, that the only way to combat it is with an angry and war-like nature. Your post represents the kind of attitude we need to have when discussing the lives of our daughters; the only way we will be able to bring our children up positively is to be positive. Thanks, Meghann, I think you’ve just turned a blog post on to simmer in my brain.

  • http://easylifestyles.wordpress.com easylifestyles

    I really enjoy reading your blog very much. Thanks for sharing this post. Live life to the fullest. Feel free to stop by our site sometime.

    Ways to Live A Healthy Lifestyle

  • http://whatsaysyou.wordpress.com whatsaysyou

    Wow, cool,blog post and thank you for sharing something that parents and daughters need to know. You have a point that girls nowadays have been exposed to and pressured to conform to the so-called beauty ideal they see in the media. Yes, us caregivers and parents are the ones should be telling those girls that inner beauty counts. It is not just happening in the country you are from but also everywhere especially in Asia. I may not be parent but I say you are doing an excellent, no, I mean superb, job raising your daughter in this day and age.

    Last but not least, here is the Singaporean version of the Dove Self-esteem Fund commercial: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gMHkhcM4T30

    When you have the time, do check out on what is the definition of the Asian beauty ideal in the modern age (that would surprise you!)

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